The Time I Fell Off Beam Five Times
No, it wasn’t in practice. No, I wasn’t hurt. No, it wasn’t even the first meet of the season.
It was … at Regionals… as a level 10.
I was in my second year of level 10, and my beam routine was stacked. I did a front tuck mount with a wolf jump out, my series was a back handspring layout step out, my leap pass was a switch leap, straddle jump, straddle jump, I did a front tuck to a beat jump, a hitch kick immediate aerial, a split half, and a round-off double full for a dismount. I figured it out back then; my routine was worth well over a 10.0 (it still would be).
Maybe my routine was too difficult for me, you ask? Nope; I could stick that sucker everyday in the gym. Solid. It was quite impressive, if I say so myself.
Back to Regionals of my second year of level 10. I wanted to make it to Nationals. That was my goal. My coaches also wanted me to make it, as a reward for all my hard work. I wasn’t so sure I could do it, though…
Here is how the meet played out.
I started on floor, one of my two strongest events. I had great tumbling, and decent dance, and scored about a 9.3. That was about average for me at this point in my level 10 career.
Next was vault, my other strongest event. I did a front handspring front tuck, and scored right around a 9.3. That was about average for me back then, too.
My third event was bars, my weakest event. I had to work very hard to reach a level 10 skill set, and I fought for every extra tenth I could get everyday. I did a decent bar routine (for anyone else) and a great bar routine (for me) that day. I got a 9.2, which was great for me at that point in my career!
Then came beam. Ah, beam, my nemesis. I actually loved beam, and I was really good at it. I just didn’t compete all that well, and I reminded myself of that every time a meet came around. My attitude wasn’t “I’ve got this.” Instead it was, “How many times will I fall today?” (I have since learned that this is not the way to self-talk your way to greatness.)
Back to the meet. So far, my tallied score was a 27.8 (9.3, 9.3, 9.2). I needed a 34.0 to make it to Nationals. I needed a 6.2 on beam to make it to Nationals. Even I could do that!
I hadn’t figured out what I needed to score on beam in order to qualify, but my coach knew. She didn’t want me to get more nervous, so she didn’t tell me. So I just warmed up, worried about how I would do, and then made those worries come true. Here is my painful experience of the longest beam routine in the world.
I saluted the judge. Run, run, front tuck, fall. I didn’t even wobble; I just simply fell. I got back up. Dance, dance, series, huge wobble, fall. More dance, full turn, wobble, stay on! Yes! Score one for Mary! Dance, dance, switch leap, straddle jump, fall. Ugh. When will this routine be over? Three falls with more to go? I felt my face get red as I jumped back up onto the beam and immediately fell off the other side. No! This was completely ridiculous. Why was this happening to me? Right now? At Regionals? In front of everyone? How embarrassing! I seriously considered just walking away from the beam and out the door. But I didn’t. I got back up on the beam, willing myself not to fall off remounting the stupid thing. I still have my front tuck and my aerial left! Nooo!
I steadied myself the best I could. Dance, dance, front tuck, small wobble, stay on. I ignored the beat jump that was supposed to come out of it; I was taking the win, and not pushing my luck. Split half, pike forward, steady… stay! Phew! I stayed on. Now hitch kick, crooked. Stay! Great. Now I had to do a standing aerial without my hitch kick to set me up. Aerial. Fall. Where’s the door? Get back up…steady… round-off double full dismount. I saluted the judges, grateful that the longest routine of my life was finally over. The judge had a pitiful “I’m so sorry you just blew your chance to go to Nationals” look on her face. I walked over to my coach. She was already wiping a tear from her eye. She gave me a hug. I was just so relieved to be on the floor. My score flashed up. 5.0. Ugh. Yes, that was my score. My coach told me, “Mary, you only needed a 6.2 to make it. You had a good meet going.”
Seriously? A 6.2 and I couldn’t even do that as a second year level 10?! I decided then and there that I didn’t deserve to go to Nationals anyway. I never wanted to be in this position again.
There were two ways I knew of to avoid being in that position again. 1. quit. 2. go back to the gym and fix the way I thought and talked to myself. Guess which one I chose?
I went to Nationals the next two years. I even competed beam for my team in college!
What I did was work on my positive mental attitude. I improved my outlook, and that improved my performance.
Next week, I’ll talk about how to improve your mental attitude to help you get what you want.
